Riding the Bus

TOP 5 WAYS I DISCOVERED TO SCREW UP WHEN RIDING THE BUS

1. Fail to wait until people exit the bus (even though they are supposed to exit from the rear) and so the bus driver screams at you, "'NOT YET!!"

2.Try at least 5 different ways to shove your ticket into the machine while an increasingly impatient line of people grows behind you. In this instance the bus drivers keeps saying,"Not that way, the OTHER way." Which really isn't helpful at all. It is amazing how many ways I tried before succeeding. And this happened more than once.

3. Failing to get off the bus in the first, second or third try, and keep getting further and further away from the place you wanted to be. In Vancouver you are supposed to exit from the back, at least that is what the signs say. You need to yank on the cord hanging by the windows hard enough to trigger it, but not so much so that it rings it multiple times (when you do that the bus driver yells at you, "You only need to ring it ONCE!" The back door does not open automatically. It is necessary to step down one step or the doors stay shut. BUT, you are not supposed to step down until the bus has fully stopped or when it is in motion. Eventually if you try several times to get off unsuccessfully the rest of the people on the bus usually yell,"Step down NOW!" At that point I wonder if I should just try to go back home and forget traveling around the country on my own. I mean really, how stupid can I get? Don't answer that...

4. Follow the directions of someone who THINKS they know when you should get off the bus. If they say the end of the line and you have left the city you should probably get off and go back the other direction.

5. Not holding on when the bus lurches forward, sending you sprawling...